Twenty Sixteen

I never imagined that I would get the opportunity to travel yet my God is so gracious and good to me! 2016 has been a big year for me. This year I have traveled to New Zealand and Australia. This Friday I will be traveling to London, France, and Spain. I have always wanted to travel but as I got older I gave up on those dreams because it wasn’t a priority and on top of that, it just didn’t seem like a possible reality. Well I was wrong [like I usually am]. God has a way of showing up in my life and showing me that He is faithful and that He is sovereign in the most awesome ways possible. God does give you the desires of your heart beyond your wildest dreams and it is mind blowing to me that He is so good despite how terrible I am. I just had to wait on His perfect timing [which if you know me, doesn’t come easy]. I am so excited to be travelling and fulfilling my dream of seeing the world.

One thing that God has been pressing into my heart lately is that He is faithful even when I am not. God is faithful in all circumstances. I will be the first to say that I am not perfect and 9 times out of 10 I will fall short. But it doesn’t matter because God doesn’t ask for perfection. He doesn’t ask for you to come perfectly put together. God wants you to come to Him just as as you are. He just wants you! All of you. Even the not so pretty parts.

Hard to believe, right?

I know I have a hard time believing that. But it’s true. And I hope that you will embark on that journey and give your life to Him.  It is undoubtedly the best decision you will ever make. It won’t be easy but it will be worth it.

Now go enjoy your world. Love everyone, including yourself.

xoxo,

Susy

Mood: Nostalgic

Living in the past is not recommended.  But at one time or another we have all experienced nostalgia. Tonight it hit me hard. It's hards to explain really but I'm sure you can relate.  Sometimes nostalgia sets in and my heart yearns for simpler times. It's crazy to witness and acknowledge the quick passing of time yet never enough to stop and savor the moments. Every once in a while I find myself wishing I could go back in time. As a teenager you want nothing more than to grow up and make your own decisions. I wish I could go back and tell my teenage self to quit trying to grow up. I wish I could tell myself to enjoy my siblings, to relish the crazy times we spent together. Regardless of who you are, life is messy. And it pulls you in a million different directions. Tonight I'm really missing the comfort of my parent's home and the closeness of the relationship I had with my siblings. I'm missing the girl I was before I was touched by the bitterness and coldness of the world. I miss the innocence that protected my mind from jumping to the wrong conclusions. I miss the girl before the hurt.

But this too shall pass [2 Corinthians 4:17-18]  My pains and sorrow are not in vain for I know my God has a greater bigger plan for my life. And yes I do miss the girl I was once but without all the trials I have faced, I would not be the woman I am today. I would not know compassion or empathy. I would not appreciate the time I spend with my family. I would not appreciate the small moments that have a lasting impact on my life. I would  not have grown. I thank God for the circumstances I've been in because it has drawn me nearer to Him.

I think it's okay to miss what once was. But it's not okay to let it dominate your life. The past is gone. But we do have the present. Live everyday thanking God and loving the people in your life. And if you've broken relationships in the past, it's not too late to mend them. I know I'm going to try.

Make peace with the past, live in the present and look forward to the amazing future God has for you.

I still have some work to do regarding making peace with my past but I know that God will heal the wounds and make my heart new. Won't you let God heal yours, too?

xoxo,
Susy

You Can't Sit With Us

Oh my gosh. Has it been two months since my last post? Yikes! I took a hiatus but I'm back in the saddle! I hope everyone enjoyed their Fourth of July weekend and got to spend some quality time with loved ones and eat way too much [I know I did]. It has been a couple months of growth for me. God has really been working on me and it hasn't been easy [I mean, is it ever?]. But I would like to share what God has been breathing into my life so allons-y [that's French for "Let's go" although now that I'm reading it, it doesn't make much sense..oh well, life doesn't make sense most of the time...]

Have you ever been in a situation where you are immediately transported back to a time in your life that wasn't the greatest? Yeah, that's happened to me way too often this past month. If there is one thing I remember most about my freshman and sophomore year of high school it was wanting to fit in [and maybe that's still true today...]. Everyone wants that, right? Everyone yearns to be accepted and to be a part of the "in crowd?" Or maybe it was just me. Either way, it was never a good feeling when you didn't make the cut. It was so awful. I remember spending hours in front of the mirror to look perfect, I remember begging my mom to buy me the same brands that the "cool kids" wore [which she never did, btw], and I remember acting like a completely different person just so they'd consider accepting me into their clique. I shudder just thinking back to those moments.

I remember the willingness to give anything [and I literally mean anything] in the world to be accepted. I remember praying to God to make me prettier and skinnier and just cooler [whatever that means]. I remember praying to be noticed and accepted. I would literally ask God to change the person I was.

Fast forward 10 years later and I found myself back in my fifteen year old self shoes. And you know what, I made that same prayer. I asked God to change characteristics about me just so that I could feel accepted. I was obsessing about the way I looked and the way I was. And it was painful. I felt like I was a freshman in high school all over again. Does my hair look good, are my clothes cute enough, are my eyebrows groomed, what color lipstick should I wear, and the list went on and on.

What I didn't realize until later [after God got a hold of me] was that the only question that I kept asking myself then and now was "Am I good enough? Am I enough?"

This is a particularly difficult subject for me to talk about not because I have self confidence issues but because I long to be accepted. Because I live in a society that is constantly telling me what I need to look like and how I need to act to be accepted. No matter where I turn on this earth, I will always be faced with a condition in order to be loved and accepted. I thought I had worked through those feelings and left them in high school but this really hit me, hard.

For a few weeks I sulked until my Heavenly Father reminded me..

"Hey, don't you know that I love you and accept you? [Jeremiah 31:3] Don't you know that you are perfect because I have made you so? [Genesis 1:27] Don't you know that my love for you is without restraint and without boundaries? Don't you know that my love for you is unconditional? Don't you know that I made you exactly how you are for a purpose? Don't you know that you are beautiful and fearfully and wonderfully made?[Psalm 139:14]  Don't you know that you are enough? Don't you know that I love you just as you are? Don't you know that I love you? Don't you know that I love you? Don't you know that I love YOU?"

Wow. 

It was difficult for me to understand that my God could love me just as I was when there were so many other entities rejecting me. It was painful. But then I realized that I was turning away from the one thing I longed for, acceptance. God loves me and accepts me. His love is unconditional. His love never fails and it endures forever [Psalm 106:1]. I realized that I was not made to fit in. I was placed in this era, with specific physical characteristics and specific character traits for a reason. And that reason is and always will be to glorify God. I learned that I needed to be who I was, not who the world wanted me to be.

I'm quiet. I'm shy. My skin isn't perfect. I cry too much. I don't always do my hair or dress up. I'm a 25 year old obsessed with Disney. I don't like to out out with large crowds. I sometimes prefer to be alone. I'm different. I am less than ordinary by society's standards but you know what? I am okay with that. Because I do not need the acceptance and approval of anyone. I do not need to fit in to stand out. I don't need a clique. I don't need anything that this world can give. All I need is God and I am 1000% sure that He is for me [Romans 8:31].

Please never let anyone dull your sparkle or tell you that you can't sit with them. Never let society tell you what beauty is because how can you put your faith and trust in something that changes its standards [and fads] every month. Never let anyone make you feel less or like you're not enough because you are more than enough. I cannot express to you how important it is to embrace the beauty that is you. I can be the first to tell you it is not easy. I struggle everyday. But always remember who created you! You were made in God's perfect image [Genesis 1:27]!

Love God above all things. Love everyone and especially love yourself.
 
xoxo,

Susy

So, Will You Be My Forever Valentine?

Did I miss Valentine's Day? I sure did! But that doesn't mean I can't still talk about it [after all February is the month of love, right?] So February 14. Valetine's Day. It has a rather bad rep if you ask me. When that day comes around, there are several Facebook posts that never fail to make an appearance..."single awareness day" is a favorite. You'll also find the "I wish there was a holiday for single people" post, the occasional "who wants to volunteer to be my girlfriend/boyfriend for valentine's day?" and the infamous "will you be my valentine?" [rolling eyes]. I won't admit to ever posting these [except for the fact that I'm a repeat offender... one year clean, though].

Just for the record, I'm a fan of love.

I love love. Anyone who knows me knows that I am the biggest sap and a huge romantic [seriously]. What I am not a fan of is commercialized "holidays" that make some people overly aware that they don't have someone to show them love on that one day. I am also not a fan of "holidays" that encourage people to go to extravagant measures to express their love to their significant other on that one day. I mean, really?

Why do we have to wait for February 14th to roll around to show love to those we should be constantly expressing our love to? I'm not saying you shouldn't celebrate Valentine's Day, what I am saying is that you should express love every single day. Apart from that, who said Valentine's Day had to be just about couples? Who made that rule? I don't just love my boyfriend. I love my parents, and my sister, and my friends, and my grandparents, and a million other people! Take the time to tell those you hold dear how much you love them. Tell them every single day.  

Now I would like to take the time to address individuals who feel a certain way because they don't have a Valentine. Okay, what does that even mean? That means you don't have anyone to give you flowers or pretty things on that day. It also means you don't have anyone to go out with on that day and tell you nice things...

So what.

You guys [and gals] let me remind of you of someone who has given you the greatest gift of all time. A gift that can never be surpassed by anything that can be given by anyone on this earth. A gift that knows no bounds, it knows no time, and it has no limits. A gift that gives you joy every single day. Do you want to know what it is? It's love. But it's not just any love. It is an everlasting love, an eternal love [Jeremiah 31:3]. It is the love that God has for His children. God loved us so much that He gave His one and only son so that we may live! [John 3:16] God gives life. He is love [1 John 4:8].


"I have loved you with an everlasting love..."

Never forget the One who has loved you, loves you, and will always love you- now and forever. God is our forever valentine and as long as He exists [forever], you will have someone to love you. You will have someone who gives you gifts through His promises of protection, provision, and peace,  you will have someone to tell you that you are fearfully and wonderfully made and that you are perfect and beautiful in His loving eyes [Psalm 139:14], you will have someone that will never leave your side [Deuteronomy 31:6]. And you will have someone to love you forever more.

Do you want a valentine? God has given and will always give everything to hold your heart. Let Him be your forever valentine and you will never be wanting of love.

So, let's think twice about posting things that aren't true. We do have a valentine!

Now,  go enjoy your world. Love everyone, including yourself and let God lavish His sweet love on you [1 John 3:1]. There is nothing that would make Him [and you] happier.

xoxo,

Susy

What the World Needs Now is Love

Two weeks of 2015 have already flown by, whaaattt? I'm convinced that each year passes more quickly than the last. I go back to school in just a few short days and I'm both excited and sad... excited because I am one step closer to being done and sad because I like not having a million pages of homework [sob]. Nevertheless, I am still pumped about this new year. There are a few things that I wanted to incorporate into my daily life. These are things that I already do but not on a regular basis. My mood dictates whether or not these things get done and it really shouldn't be that way. One of these things is giving thanks to the One that gave it all for me. I want to be more intentional about it. I can say that I give thanks to my Heavenly Father twice a week... on Wednesday and Sunday.. and only because I am asked to. Other than that, I am only thankful on days after I pass a test I "studied" for.. I mean because, right..

Giving thanks really makes you think about all the blessings you have in your life. Even on the worst of days there is something to be thankful for [like the fact that you are alive even though its a pretty crappy day]. This year [and for the rest of my life], I want to thank my God every single day. I want to wake up and before I check facebook or instagram or twitter or whatever, I want to thank my Father for something in my life that He has blessed me with [ 1 Chronicles 16:34]. I don't think we say thank you enough. I know I complain more than I give thanks and so this year I want to change. I hope that this is only the beginning of a change that will remain for the rest of my life. So today, I am thankful for each of your lives. I am thankful for the opportunity to be able to share my life with y'all.

Another thing I have decided to do is 1,000 Acts of Kindness. This is just one website. There are many others out there. Some sites call it Random Acts of Kindness or Pay it Forward. But it's pretty easy. All you must do is 1,000 [or whichever number you feel like] Acts of Kindness. What that may be is completely up to you! You can buy someone coffee. You can help your neighbor take out their trash. Walk your friend's dog. Volunteer your time somewhere. It doesn't have to be big because even the smallest gesture can make a difference. I decided to do this because I have spent 25 years making everything in this world about me. God, through His son, performed the ultimate act of love and kindness when He sent His one and only son to die for us [ Romans 5:8; John 3:16]. I want to be like that. I want to be kind and selfless and loving. I want my life to make a difference.

And so there you have it. I want to encourage you guys to join me on this journey! Join me in being thankful for what we have and join me in filling this world with love. So much evil and darkness exists in this world. One light makes a difference but imagine the light that can come from a multitude of people! Let's bring light to the world.

Share in the comments below what you are thankful for or what you decided to do as your act of kindness! I would love to hear it! Now, go enjoy your world. Love everyone, including yourself! Be blessed.

xoxo,

Susy

Half Empty or Half Full?

You guys, I've really been struggling with this blog. I begin a post and then stop because I don't feel it's good enough. For some reason I feel like my posts have to be pages long and super deep. It's so frustrating. But then I stopped and asked myself who was I trying to impress and what I was trying to accomplish. I began this blog because I wanted my stories and experiences to reach others and help them through similar difficult situations. I simply wanted to share the struggles in my life and to let others know that they were not alone. Much to my horror I realized I was also doing it for my own glory. I wanted to gain followers. I wanted to be noticed. I just wanted more. More. More. More. I discovered that this was a pattern that spilled over into all areas of my life. I guess I bought into my generation's line of thinking more than I cared to admit. I felt I was entitled to everything. I constantly found myself thinking of the things I didn't have or the things I wish I had and immediately I felt I must be missing something. I felt wronged because I hadn't been given the things I deserved. I'm a princess and by golly how dare anyone deny me the things I want.

Boy, have I been wrong [you'll find I'm wrong, a lot].

Here's what I know. Something a pastor said really resonated with me.

"We often complain that our cup isn't full but we don't stop to think that it never runs dry."

I've been so busy wanting to fill my cup to the brim that I haven't stopped to acknowledge my Heavenly Father's faithfulness. I have never been left needing anything. My God has always provided. He has never let my cup run dry. It's not about whether your cup is half empty or half full, it's about the fact that there is always something in it and that means that God is always working in your life!

God never promised an easy journey but He has promised to never leave our side. Today I was reminded to count my blessings and to stop wanting more of the things that don't matter and more of what does. I discovered that this blog was not about me. It was about the things God placed on my heart to share with others. I hope to remember that every time I sit down and write something for you guys. I want you to be just as blessed by my words as I am by sharing with you all. Oh, and for the record, I don't want the things I deserve. Because the only thing I deserve is death. And yet my Heavenly Father and Savior is merciful enough to grant me life. With God, I already have more than I could ever need. Or want. 

And I am a princess. But not because I'm entitled or deserve anything. But because my Father is the King of kings [1 Timothy 6:15] and I am His daughter. Once upon a time won't always look how we want it to but if we stop long enough to let God work in our lives, it will be far better than any fairytale we can ever dream up. God is always working, even if we can't see it. And remember, no matter the circumstance, God makes all things work together for good for those who love Him [Romans 8:28].


Enjoy your world, y'all. Love everyone and when you're feeling down, count your blessings.

xoxo,

Susy

Sticks and Stones..

Ya’ll, I’m sorry that I’ve been MIA for weeks!  Yikes.  Here comes some self disclosure—I’m a grad student and since the semester has started, I have been super busy. But enough lollygagging, onward!

I want to share something that God has put on my heart lately. But first I want to remind everyone of a certain phrase that I’m sure everyone is familiar with. “Sticks and stones may break my bones [I’m pretty sure you just completed the rest of that phrase in your head] but words will never hurt me.”  I’ve been thinking a lot about this statement. My stance has always been, and always will be, that words have extraordinary power. Think about it. I love to read and many times I find myself lost in the world created by the very words on the page. There is something magical about words that give them the power to transport people to an entirely different realm.

Words have the ability to transport you places. They also have the ability to build up or tear down. It is very heavy- heartedly that I say that most of the time we use words to tear down. Sometimes we do it unintentionally. And worse, sometimes we do it intentionally. Now, remember that phrase? How true does it ring to you now?

 I believe that statement is false.

Because I have experienced the pain that words can cause. I have seen the pain and damage that words can inflict. Once something is said, you can never unsay it. I want you to think of the last time someone said something to you and it completely tore you apart. Did it hurt? Did you feel less pain than you would have felt if a stone have been thrown at you? No. Because pain is pain regardless of the way it is inflicted.

BUT [there’s always a ‘but’] here is the flip side of that. WE have power over our words! What?! Let me say that again, WE have power over our words! We have the ability to choose words that will build up! Let’s choose to be someone who is positive with their words. Let’s choose encouragement over criticism. We are all in this together, how much lovelier would it be to be surrounded by people who encourage and build up? Take the first step! Make the decision to speak blessings over people, not curses.  Ephesians 4:29 says “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” God placed this verse on my heart and it really convicted me. I was using my words to tear people down, even though they did not hear me, it was still damaging the way other people perceived them. I had to choose to be positive!  As daughter of The King, I am called to a higher standard. I had to stop using words to break people down. And let me tell you, it is hard! It is a challenge and I struggle with it every day but through Christ, I can do anything [Philippians 4:13].

 

I want to invite you to take this journey with me! But most importantly I want you to take this journey to help strengthen your walk with God.  Take the challenge and begin to encourage people. I can tell you that it is very rewarding when you let Christ use you to encourage others. Next time you want to make a sarcastic comment or you want to let a word slip off of your tongue; remember the power you have to hurt others. Remember how it felt to be hurt by words.

“Words are not words, they are airplanes, they take us places.” Let’s go to pretty places. Not places filled with poison and chaos.

Now, go enjoy your world. Love everyone, including yourself.

Don't forget to encourage others. One kind word can change someone's life.

xoxo,

SJ